In the end, what P Chidambaram said “in a lighter vein” may be part of the reality the government is trying to push through. “In a lighter vein, I may say that sometimes CBI itself pretends to be a victim to get autonomy,” the finance minister said on Tuesday (November 12) while addressing the golden jubilee function of the investigating agency.

Only, the central bureau of investigation (CBI) is often also made a victim by the UPA-II government, blinded as it must be now with so many files of cases relating to corruption and irregularities cutting short its vision, while aiming punches at others.

While Chidambaram sent a right uppercut on the chin of the erstwhile comptroller and auditor general (CAG) Vinod Rai – “There are a number of cases in which investigating agencies like CAG have overstepped their limits and attempted to convert executive decisions into crimes” – his ultimate aim must have been to take a jab at the supreme court. The reason’s obvious: no other agency or organisation has expressed more disapproval of the government’s decisions, moves and much-discussed policies in recent times than the apex court.

But neither Chidambaram nor prime minister Manmohan Singh, who addressed the same event a day before, obviously could afford to take on the CBI. Ergo, the drawn-out focus on “policies” and “policymaking” – as if they are some sort of sanctimonious rocket science that only a chosen few can comprehend, criticise or comment upon, though the biggest carp against the UPA-II has been about its policy paralysis, and not only by BJP spokesperson on TV. And ergo, the wrath unleashed on the CBI.

“Policymaking is a multi-layered process. I don't think it is right for investigating agency to judge policy without evidence of mala fide,” Manmohan Singh said. But the investigating agency in question, dear PM, had no intention to “judge” the policy. It was asked by supreme court to probe in depth.

“The CBI isn’t a caged parrot and the C of CBI doesn’t stand for Congress,” Chidambaram said the following day, picking up from where Singh had left. But, dear Mr FM, was it not the supreme court that had named the agency “the caged parrot”, and in exasperation, one might add?

“Functional autonomy does not mean that you (CBI) are free from general rules,” the FM, who was the home minister and the CBI’s boss earlier, said further. Again, was it not the top court that sought more freedom and autonomy for the CBI?

Chidambaram also said that agencies (read CBI and CAG) should not jump to conclusion that a business decision is a criminal one without sufficient evidence.

Beg your pardon, sir, but the CBI has never concluded that a business decision is criminal. In fact, it can be questioned for failing to do both – conclude that a business decision can ALSO be a criminal one, as also go out and collate evidence to back it up. All the agency did was to utter words to the effect of “competent authority” in the coal block allocation scam, a “business decision” that was also ostensibly criminal, and which is alleged to have led to presumptive losses amounting to Rs 1.76 lakh crore.

Now, since no one was ready to raise his/her hand to the call of competent authority, even though the coal ministry was under the PM’s jurisdiction at the time, the CBI in any case did not have a case but to call into play the role of the said authority, ticked off as it already was more than once by the apex court for doing a “collaborative probe”.

Over to the supreme court’s observations in May: "The CBI has become a caged parrot speaking in its master's voice. It's a sordid saga that there are many masters and giving unbridled power to the CBI is not possible. The CBI has become the police force and is in the administrative control of the central government. CBI investigations have to be independent."

One can be reasonably certain that the court might take a similar view regarding the PM and FM’s statements if it took suo motu notice of their addresses that were a direct assault on its May order.

“The police and the investigative agencies... are a part of the executive and must function under its administrative supervision,” Manmohan Singh said, in breach of the top court’s observation that it is painful to "see the credibility of CBI getting affected”.

Not quite intriguingly, all this harangue comes barely a month after Singh made his nth “open book” statement while returning from St Petersburg after attending the G20 Summit: "I try to answer all questions that have been raised. I have no desire to hide anything from parliament, whether it is the coal matter, or other matters…. I have been as forthright as I can. So I am an open book.”

Only, the open book is telling the reader that its hands are, well, tied and the page cannot be turned.