There’s no difference under India's cultural law (???) and perception and prejudice between Article 377 against gays and being left-handed.

I am left-handed. My parents never tried to change me. On the contrary they saw it as a sign of great intellect. Not entirely true but they should have their illusions. But growing up I was told by others it was unnatural, against our great Indian culture and often, at Loyola College Chennai no one would sit next to me at the lunchroom because what I was doing was disgraceful. Despicable. Disgraceful enough for worried parents all over India to beat the crap out of their children to change and warp them so totally. They still do it. By the thousands. It has to be done, it is an Indian cultural demand.

Where are Arnob and Barkha on this one...talk to me about my scars, people.

The warden in the hostel had to call me and warn me to change. He said the boys had made complaints about my left-handed eating style. On occasions when mates called me to their homes the ladies in the house would invariably scream ‘aaaayeeeeo’ when I began to eat. They were truly horrified. One lady even dropped a bowl in shock.

And I was wondering in the sober light of day what if some judge found some archaic law that indicted left-handed people. There was a time they burnt them at the stake. They were widely shunned by society and they were told the devil had gotten inside them and rewired them. What if some judicial genius a day before his retirement said, it is not Indian culture, we wash our bottoms with our left hands, we cannot have this blot on our purity, criminalise them (at one time in history we were) and some Baba Ramdev came up and said, that is why right is right and left is left behind (bai and dai, you twit) it is a human abomination to have left-handed people in the world, today this, tomorrow they will shake with that hand, no, no, no, we cannot allow it, woe is me.

The scary thing is, would parliament stand by me? I don't know. Are left-handed people a vote bank, darn it?