Ever since 9/11 the Americans have made it very clear that they are paranoid about security. They have also made it equally clear that they will profile people and their skies are unfriendly and a visa is no defence against arbitrary suspicion. They have also told you that what is not suspicious to you but is to them will be suspicion per se because it is their country, so there. What part of it did Indian film maker Vijay Kumar currently in a Houston facility as a guest of the US government not understand when he conducted himself in as fashion that would have made some quota inducted two digit IQ 'hillbilly from the boonies' officer in Homeland Security go, hmmmm, something is not quite right.

I have probably done 400 flights, some of them to the USA. Just as I leave behind my mouthwash if I go to Kuwait in case there is alcohol in it or even cough med if it is Bahrain in case it has codeine; so too, do I resist my temptation to carry brass knuckles in my luggage. Actually, the thought has not crossed my mind. I do not have brass knuckles but even if I did I don’t believe that would be a travel priority. By the same token I haven’t yet decided to go to the US or Europe carrying religious literature from a religion to which I do not belong. The latest bestseller is good enough for me. I fidget and I sweat, in themselves innocuous activities but combined with the rest of the stuff at an American airport, what was he thinking, people? I am sorry for his plight, I hope he gets deported but come on, if you were on a plane bound for New York would you be carrying brass knuckles?

I am listening to these airhead anchors on Times TV sharing this saga, one mildly bloated shrilly pious pundit of pedantry and he is rabbiting on about how no American would be treated like this if he was arrested and if he was the whole of the continental USA would swoop down in revenge led by the president himself… woo hoo…here comes the cavalry.

Damn right brother, the cavalry does come. The fact is that life in the USA is given a much higher value. We can moan and groan all we want but life in India is cheap. Very cheap. Our system allows for it. Our ambassadors and other agencies have the power of a paper knife on granite when it comes to influence. Our governments do not even consider riding in to the rescue. India seldom twists an arm to help an individual from Bharat the great and we all know that. The Americans go ballistic.

Case in point. These days the Aussies have a new sport called Indian bashing or whatever and there has been a slew of attacks and what has the Indian government done? Diddley squat. Some rhetoric, a feeble bleat of protest and that is about it. So blame the system where politicians and the bureaucracy and our history of 60 years of negative networking and limited influence have marginalized us when it comes to helping Indians in distress. All those of you have travelled abroad, raise your hands if you believe that your embassy will ride to the rescue if you are in trouble in a foreign country. Raise your hands half way up if you think you will access the ambassador or the consul general unless you are a minister’s son in law? See what I mean. No one. I rest my case.

Moral of the story: if you are going to America leave your beloved brass knuckles behind.